Some girls won't dance to the beat of the track.

Marilyn, Judy, Sylvia... Tell 'em how you feel girls.
At the moment, I am actually addicted to the lyrics of Lady Gaga. I wish that I could write lyrics in the same way she does, it's so inpiring. She actually writes about things that the public want to hear about such as money, fame, adultery and sex. Not like these R'n'B wannabes who only write songs about each other's 'bootys' and insist on calling each other 'Shawti'. Most of the people they're talking about aren't even that short. I actually hate that 'Eeny Meeny Mino Mo Lover' song. You know people have ran out of song ideas when they start to use playground songs to use within a half-hearted attempt at a number one hit. Lady Gaga is different, each sentence holds a unique message. I have some favourite Gaga lyrics which I feel the need to list.

'I'm your biggest fan I'll follow you until you love me' - Paparazzi (The Fame)
'Midnight at the glamour show on a Sunday night, everybody drink another Whisky and wine' - Vanity
'Russian roulette is not the same without a gun' - Pokerface (The Fame)
'Silicone, saline, poison, inject me baby, I'm a free bitch' - Dance In The Dark (The Fame Monster)
'That's M, O, N, E, Y, so sexy, I...' - Money Honey (The Fame)
'I'm shiny and I know it, don't know why you wanna blow it need a man who likes it rough' - I Like It Rough (The Fame)

So yeah, Lady Gaga is the shiz.

Pack up your troubles in your old kit bag.

Is it possible to turn your feelings off to stop from being hurt? I sure hope so.

On a more optimistic note, it's summer and the heatwave is upon us, again. I've had to crack my window open due to the fact that I felt like I was being cooked for christmas dinner. However, this weekend has been brilliant. On Friday night I went to see Shappi Khorsandi from 'Live at the Apollo', she made me laugh until I cried. I had Emily's BBQ on Saturday night which is where I tried a jalepeno pepper. That was a bad idea. Not one of my best. On Sunday there was Fiona's pastel-themed party which was great and tonight we all went out for a meal. I love my friends so much. They actually mean a lot to me. They tell me the truth, whether it's what I want to hear or not and are always there for me.

'I don't care what the people may say, what the people may say about me' - Eliza Doolittle

If you seek Amy.

In my last blog. I fucked up.
Apparently I got both Star Trek and Star Wars mixed up which actually proves my point... I have no interest in Sci-Fi what so ever. So piss off you dirty Trekkies and/or Jedis. I hate you all.

Short rant tonight. As I can't be arsed.
I hate people that say 'comdom' as apposed to 'condom'. These are the type of people who should be using them as they should be banned from reproducing.

Thanks. Good night.

I'm still, I'm still Jenny from the block.

I ACTUALLY HATE MOST BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I hate the fact that Rice Krispies' main selling point is that vile little sound they insist on making. If I wanted that sound echoing around my kitchen I would employ hundereds of dogs to sit around my house licking themselves because that, my love, is what it sounds like. There is actually no need. It's just a waste of sound energy. So basically, shut up and just do your job. Sit there in my milk. Silently. I also really dislike the fact that there are now no toys in cereal. What do Kellogs actually think they're doing? The toy was the reason most kids wanted the cereal. It was the same every week. You used to go to the supermarket, kick and scream for the cereal you wanted and then get the toy and not eat the cereal. It was mega lolz.

I also hate Star Trek fans...
Or 'Trekkies' as they prefer to be called. Especially the ones that get too into it and change their religion to 'Jedi'. You know what? Why don't you go and get a socially acceptable hobby and enter the real world before I take your 'limited edition' light saber and shove it up your hairy arsehole! These are the type of people that really annoy the life out of me. It's a film for goodness sake, it's fictional and we all know it's fictional, so why go and revolve a whole religion around it. I admit, Christianity may be a big lie but I know that a set of directors and SFX guys didn't sit there adding special effects to 'Noah's Ark'. Surely you can tell by the credits at the end of the film that it's fake and not real enough to make a religion out of. WHY ARE YOU PEOPLE STILL ALIVE? You actually piss me off to my core. I hope the Queen sets a ban on all Sci-Fi movies, all of you will have nothing to live for. It's not like your actually going to go anywhere in the future. Unless the holy 'R2-D2' tells you to...

PISS OFF YOU ANNOYING CUNTS!

Rant over. I love you. Good night.

There's nothing you can't do, now your in New York...

This weekend was a bit good, bitches.
On Saturday, I went to a meal at 'Ask' with some people for Fran's birthday meal. Bearing in mind her birthday is like a century away, but still. It was really good. Apart from the dirty glasses, dripping air conditioning and Sohinip about flying through the wall because she blew herself away sneezing. Also, there was a bit of a disagreement between a group of chavs in town which scared me slightly. I hate chavs. They scare me. Not the fact that they're 'ard', it's just the fact that they carry knives around with them and walk around in fleets. Chavs really piss me off. I mean, in the olden days, you had a fight and that was the end of it. But now, you have to fight your way through various thugs who attempt to beat you to the ground and then they decide to get their 'mandemz' on you. You know what? FIGHT YOUR OWN FUCKING BATTLES!

I had to pause there, my mother wanted to to change my bedclothes. Which is hard. I actually can't do it. My parents have done it for me my whole life, it's only recently I've had to do it for myself. I have to admit, being an only child, I do get everything done for me, cooking, cleaning, money etc. It's going to be awful when I have to live alone. But seriously, changing sheets is hard. Can't I just sleep in the same ones forever? No, because of fucking bed bugs. What are they, seriously? And what do they actually do except chew on your whilst your asleep and at your most vunerable, cowards! How do they even get into mattresses anyway? Do they pump them in there at the mattress factory? Stupid bloody bed bugs...

You know what else is useless? Knives and forks. If God seriously wanted us to use them, he would have moulded them to our fingers. Can't I just shove my face into my food or even eat with my hands? I'm sorry, but I'm not lady-like at all. What else is pointless?... OH YEAH! Shower curtains on holiday. They seem to have an attraction to my leg and like to cling onto it and never let go. I have to actually moonwalk in the shower to get it from around my leg. I never have this problem with English shower curtains, just the foreign ones.

Where actually was I? Oh. The weekend. So yeah, Fran's meal was good. I spent Sunday with the father. Which was a really good day. I went to some pub where there were some guys on jet skis doing tricks which actually amazed me. Then we went for a meal at a resturant and then went back to his to make 'Shake It Baby!' milkshakes in the blender he'd bought. FUN TIMES.

Welcome To The Circus!

Enter one, enter all,
The circus of the bizzare.
Where the lights flash and the lions roar,
And there's alway a freakshow.

As you can see, I've changed my layout. I'm really into all the circusy stuff and I have no idea why. I haven't done a blog in a while too. Don't worry though! Normal service will resume in a couple of days.

The longest tent poles,
The biggest circus balls,
We've got it all!
Welcome, to the circus!

That boy is a hoxton hero.

Its back! Another list of things that really grind my gears...

Clingfilm... it sticks to itself when it feels like it and stresses me out.
Liverpool accents.
Oasis.
People that fight because of football, or any sport for that matter.
The fact men don't wear underwear under their kilts.
When my face falls into a certain pose when a camera is thrust infront of me.
When old aged pentioners give birth.
People who say 'comdom'. This type of people should not be living, let alone reproducing.
Old people who walk slowly infront of me in town.
People who talk in a baby voice.
When you thought it was 'just a fart'.
How specific dating sites are becoming: SingleMuslim.com for example.
When my dad watches 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' and gets all the questions wrong.
Dappy.
Tulisa.
NDubz in general.
People who dedicate days to Call Of Duty.
Riddles. When am I ever going to need these in life, really?
The fact that Miley Cyrus looks like a horse, but only when she's Hannah Montanna.
The term 'children should be seen and not heard'. You shouldn't have conceived me then, cunt.
People who turn every conversation into a discussion about sex.
The 'snooze' button on alarms. Its evil and makes me late, a lot.
The fact I actually get scared when I don't send on chain letters.
The phrase 'That's What She Said'.
People who use the word 'Nom'. Please, grow up or get out of my life.
'404 Error' on computers. Please don't grace my computer screen again.
The fact my mother won't let me have a hamster, because my last one's eye fell out.

There may be a part three, if I can be arsed.

Milk and two sugars...

My mind is blown.
I actually didn't know people read this. I thought people just scanned through it because I annoyingly post it here and there hoping that someone will read it. But today, I have found out that even people who I don't talk to read this, which has made me happy. I tend to come across as a moaning, bitchy and emotional person, which I am but I am also a very paranoid person. I beleive its because I say soooooo much crap behind people's backs, I expect people to do it in return. It's my own fault.

I should work for Heat Magazine.
I have come up with the idea of asking The Queen to pose as 'Torso of the Week' in Heat magazine. She could stand there, unclothed, with her corgis who will be covering vital parts of herself with a headline that reads 'The Queen Shows Us Her Puppies!' Okay, so that's a bit of a strange thought, but I have actually dreamed of working on a magazine, I love gossip and designing, so it seems like my dream job to be honest.

By the way...
If you came here looking for a 'pause for thought' blog, you came to the wrong place. I like talking about things I dislike and I also prefer to rant quite a lot. I'm no good with the deep stuff. So take a look at the blog below, girl's got skills...

http://makemebrandnew.blogspot.com/

Take a look then, bitches.